This Is Not The End. This Is Not The Beginning.

3:46am.

It was a slow Monday. Words were in the air. We were all at the office working and doing what we do. I washed my hands after eating my chicken at 6:15pm and looked out the window towards the field. There you were in your black long pants and white t-shirt over a black inside. You were sitting on that bench we always sit on. 

I walked over and sat beside you in silence while we saw young boys playing football and people doing their evening exercise. The clouds were moving towards the left. The wind was blowing a constant flow. We sat and admired the sky turning colours and changing forms. We marvelled at the setting sky. 

We talked. And we talked. We talked about so many things. 

I felt so free. So liberated. I felt like I could be really honest, for once, with a friend. Perhaps for the first time in a long, long time, I was walking beside a friend. She wasn't a wife, a partner, a commitment. She became a friend. It was the most beautiful thing to be able to come out from my burrow and open my doors to welcome a friend into my home. 

I wished we had more of these in our past.

So we talked about... it.

Our separation. 

It is the most painful thing to talk about. I finally felt what it was like having a heartache. 

At 11:30pm we went to Palmgrove Mamak and had ourselves a plate of Indo Mee Telur Mata each. I had an extra chicken and you a very refreshing Limau Ice. 

After our supper, we went back to the office and we walked again. And we talked. And we went back in and lay down on the green grass with the windows opened. There were stars. And clouds. We held hands laying side by side. I missed that feeling. Holding the hands of my wife while laying down.

You will fetch me tomorrow. We will go to meet the lawyer.

It's time to find ourselves.